The cats of the neighborhood follow a route of their own and a timing that beats the clock. It’s as if they know exactly when the fish seller enters the street announcing his arrival with that startling Beep Beep noise. As I watch them walking along the narrow compound wall, they appear to me like models on a ramp wearing different colored clothes. One of them sports a pitch black skin coat and often looks at me with its shiny green eyes. So, the models ramp walk, drawing in the smell of fish probably expecting to get a head or two from backyards. Seeing the show, the kid gets excited. He observes every movement and starts formulating his train of thoughts. Then he asks a zillion questions about cats. I answer patiently. Once the cats are gone, silence takes over. At times, the rustling of split plantain leaves broke the stillness.. Irregular shadows danced on the wall when the breeze took charge. The clothes on the string looks brighter as they fly towards the sunny sky. The leaves of the jack fruit tree glimmered in the afternoon light. I sat back and mulled over waiting for my evening tea. I longed to take out the book which I bought months back, kept on the shelf untouched. Then I thought maybe I should watch a movie which I had missed. I quickly brushed away the thought, trying to figure out what I really wanted to do, because there were so many To-Do’s that I didn’t know what to do. Finally I put my feet up and wrote about the luxury of spending a laid-back afternoon at home.
She was young and soft-hearted like a flower. A sharp angry look could easily put her face to gloom. She was the princess at her abode. Often, she used to disappear into her own little world. She had a habit of day dreaming with her favourite playlists On. She loved grooming herself looking at the mirror. Some days she picked a vibrant nail colour out of her cosmetic shelf and painted her long beautiful nails. Her food menu was just a call away. The small kitchen table welcomed her with meals that she loved the most. She was up-to-date about the latest movies screened at the theatres. She loved her little local library where she would leisurely find her picks. At the parties, she flaunted her long luscious tresses.
A few years later…
At her new abode, the flower is busy juggling. She has become the master decision maker. She could not afford to be soft anymore. She has transformed herself from a flower to a tree trunk. She wakes up early with child alarms and face kicks. Not only did she become an expert cook, but she also learnt to bake. She is aware that cleaning the house is a never ending process. Her soft fingers had knife cuts & bandaids. The luscious hair ended up looking messy, the fashion clothes had stains of different colors. She was always the hot coffee machine, but seldom got to drink her coffee hot. She has become a better driver, thanks to the grocery shopping sprees and play dates. At night, she tried to recollect her favorite bedtime stories. She has now become an expert at juggling. She secretly wore her duties & accomplishments like sequences on her gown. The princess has become the Queen.
As Mother’s day is nearing, here is my pick. I decided to share my opinion about – why daughters and mothers have a lot of disagreements between them.
So, the fact is you always enjoy hearing someone saying good about yourself. You keep expectations for every casual thing you do, the food that you prepare or the dress that you wear needs some kind of attention. You are result oriented (we all are!). Even if someone really appreciates you for the efforts, you will seldom hear that from your own mother.
At home, the pampering mode gradually fades away when the daughter starts to venture out on her own. During the early twenties, the girls do some self analysis, exploring their own potential and making new friends. Late twenties and thirties are about finding a career, learning to cook, finding the guy, and dressing up nice infront of family! Young mothers do the juggling exercise to balance three verticals – home, work and children.
Everyday it feels as if you are doing everything but no-one is there to acknowledge it! Yes, not even your dear mother. You just try to copy your mother, but somehow things does not seem satisfactory. Because you are not getting rewarded for your actions.
Have you wondered why mothers hardly give words of appreciation to daughters? It’s just their way of making you strong and able. When they scold you for silly matters, they are throwing you to the world out there, where you will face adversities and learn to live against the odds.
Your mother, she expects you to be the best and never gives you a chance to be over confident. She always wish that you evolve and be like her, but never agrees to it even if you succeed. So call it generation gap, signs of ageing or whatever, mother is your best critic and motivator. She owns the privilege to provide life’s invaluable lessons that nooneelse can teach you. She just wants you to be perfect in all sense.
Happy Mother’s Day.
What do I mean to the world around me? What impact would I make living in planet earth? What makes me different from others? Ever had these moments of deliberation?
Quite often while I’m busy with the daily chores or travelling to work, I contemplate on these lines. Everyday we try to abide by the rules of relationships. At home we become the care takers and at work we are the robots programmed to do tasks which are aligned to our roles. Although we have no clue where we are heading to, the ride just goes on like it’s insane. Yes we go in Circles. We come back and sleep to repeat it the next day. I hear people grumbling about trivial matters that can actually be overlooked. They have a set of things that they do everyday and cannot imagine pressing the pause button. They think in loops and complicate simple things in life forgetting to explore the sunny side of life.
So, when you really feel you are loosing track of the bottom-line, just take a break and go to a nearby park. Sit back & breathe, revel in the glory of nature. Try smiling at a stranger and see how you feel about it. You don’t have to travel miles to take a vacation. You can have your small vacations everyday by taking time off your routine. Explore a new coffee shop or library and treat yourself with something you love.
Instead of devoting your energy towards things that you cannot change, look around for things that can enrich you & bring back the cheer. So, it is okay if you don’t clean your house for a day or ignore the dishes that has piled up. If your maid didn’t turn up one day just take it easy, you always have a plan B. Don’t freak out if your kid spilled some milk on the bed, it is okay because even you would have done this too. It is crucial that you shouldn’t let frustrations take charge especially when you have children around. They learn & absorb the little things quickly. Pass on good vibes to them & set no limits for expressing your love.
Why don’t you choose contentment and happiness over petty things that can’t make good memories? Make time for your family but make sure that you also give time for yourself to think deep. Count your blessings and savour the treats that life has already given you! Look back and see what you’ve missed, chase your crazy dreams.
Lashing rains, the Good Vibe of the day
Dark clouds lingered above,
yet the moon & a pair of stars unveiled
The feel of damp air, a summer surprise
Hazy flickering lights loomed across the sky
I whispered goodbyes to the unknown
A silly wish sprouted to fly away with them
Not a new thing.. I dream, secretly
A tree was in bloom not far away
Sweet fragnance of Champak it was
Sleep breezed in.. Bliss!
Not a new thing..the dreams,
I flew away